Monday, December 14, 2009

Hitchhiker's guide to Hyderabad



my worst fears are realized....all dese time surrounded wid great friends i always maintained this hope that maybe I am not a loner after all....

but guess what...i am such a hardcore self absorbent bitch!!!

on the lieu of some cool sounding research project, it is my first getaway to Hyderabad...all alone....no family, no friends...just me and me..

I as usual stocked up my laptop and novels scared that I will be totally bored away frm ppl i kno...

well novels stayed untouched and most of da movies in lappy still to be seen and my trip is goin to end in 5 days...

I am soo much in love with myself that I lose myself everyday to this city to find a tired me at the end of the day.....I am finally a hitchhiker ....

I dare me to explore, I treat me, I flirt wid me(not in gayish sense!!!!!!!), I fight wid me and den again reconcile....

losing and finding me in this small by lanes and to visibly revolting street food...may surely hurt my tummy in coming days...but who cares..!!!

But apart from me dis city has been hugely exciting....and hence i would like to list some my views about Hyderabad!!!!

(**My critical views should not hurt ny hyderabadi...dey are meant to be taken as fun...and even if dey do...u dunt kno my name :D .... so u cant even sue me!! :P)


1> Whole world is troubled abt Telengana...but hyderabadis dunt even care...dey r happy go lucky ppl...as long as Biriyani is dere...dey as well stay in Africa!!!


Only difference it makes to me is i cant crack my joke like:

Q> What does Hyderabadis drink??

A> AP Fizz :D


That was funny....okk dat wasnt funny...but people who found it funny lemme kno!!! ur r my tru fans!!!


2> Now lets study English.... when the word "Footpath" was used to define those thin elevated side of the road...dey had some meanin...


'foot' as in ur leg....human leg, should traverse that 'path'....now if it was meant for motorbikes...dey could have called it 'wheelpath' isnt it??? u see da difference!!!


3 >Now in any normal part of world a TAXI can carry 6 ppl at most comfortably......but if a tractor size auto is carrying 10-11 ppl comfortably(ummm!!!) wats da point of calling it MINI TAXI.... 11>6...get it!!!


4> The best ppl to bargain with is the auto walas.... 1st day to go to Ameerpet... I said '80' so agreed on '90'...

next day I said '60' so dey agreed on '70'


gues wat...3rd day i said '40'..dey agreed on '45'


I tried '20' ...now da guy gave me dirty glance!!!!



5> Guess the most common shop in Hyderabad....obviously its not medicine shop...i rarely found any.....it is ...tada...liqour shop....aka 'WINE' shop( thou they mite not keep wine)


each gully has atleast 2 liqour shops....


I stay at a place called Balanagar....here there is a Bar flanked my 2 wine shops on both sides...wtf!!!


6> Now i kno prostitution is bad, immoral, unethical and blah blah...but apart from that can anyone tell me how come dere r hookers on streets at 7 in the evenin....dammit....its just evenin...not even night....even there are kids in the park


Chandra Babu thout abt a gr8 idea for a cheap theme park at NTR gardens....but let us poor mortal souls rest in the cool breeze of Hussain Sagar rather than constant pestering from veiled women....ooo scary!!!


7> Now I have to admit I am impressed by the bus service here...but i am greatly annoyed by da way conductor asks fr ticket.....in case u dont kno...every state conductor has a unique ticket calling tone....dats how dey recognize each other at Annual National Bus Conductors Meet...


well here dey was is "tiickkeetsssssssssssssss......." and dat ssss continues till u get frustrated and feel like peeing....


warnin....never board bus here if u feel like peeing....chances of a dry pant are very less :|


8> Comin back to auto walas....its funny that no auto wala here knos da places properly...hw to recognize....welll


if the autowala doesnt knos da place u told...he will give to dude-are-we-both-in-the-same-city look!!!


and if he knos...back 2 steps..coz he gets soo excited dat he as well hug u and cry!!!

9> telegu is an easy language..trust me....i had a conversation wid an autowala in telegu fr whole 10 mins....thankfully...."hmmm"(wid a deep grunt) and laughing out loud....is same fr all languages...I kept doin it alternatively...coz he was so excited talkin wid me...i dint had da heart to tell i had no idea wat he was talkin abt!!!


10> I love the cyber cafe here!!! dey are a big room wid small cubicles a wid door...only thing missing inside is some tissues and lube..... :P


u can actually listen people grunting in some cubicles....and if u come across someone else while reachin ur cubicle...i get da luk "dude...y u need a book if u r goin to watch porn"


nobody believes me dat i actually need net for my project work!!! :(


well always wash ur hands after u use those cyber cafe keyboards!!!!


11> anoder great place is da tea cafe here on every road corner!!! wid dere over priced and over sweet tea and allowed smoking inside...dey are my ideal couch fr day!!!


but in these past 10 days I fell in love wid this bitter sweet hyderabad!!!



and for da rest 5 days of my stay here....hyderbad!!! entertain me!!! :)

"To be on your own
With no direction home
Like a complete unknown
Like a rolling stone"

-Bob Dylan

Sunday, November 29, 2009

Blah Blah!!! Blaaah!! Blah!!



I am happy....yea it happens rarely...but i am happy!!!

Exams are over!!! I have 1 month of vacation to look forward !!! Winter is getting all the more chilly!!! And so many prospective fun plans hatchin in my mind!!! Ahh life!!!....

So as I am so happy I am so unable to write any fiction.....my next story is still playing in my mind...searchin fr a deserving ending and proper words....damn!!! waiting to get sad

Thus i thot lets blabber a bit randomly.....

let me admit at first I have a peculiarly bad habit on evesdroppin oders conversation....in bus stops, restaurants and parks....wen i m alone i m drawn to oder's convos....

And if u try doin it...u will be amused dat how funny they are....
Disclaimer: All the characters below and events are real and they happend in front of my eyes!! So if u r one of the characters in those events.Dunt mind. Shit Happens!! I have kept the dialogues in Hindi as they were told to retain the flavor :D



Location: Chai shop behind my college

Characters: Few guys frm our college prolly...dunno!!


Guy1: "abbe chetan bhagat ka one night @ call center para"

Guy2: "wo kaun hai"


Guy3:"arre ise kuch pata nahi.bahut sahi writer hai"


Guy1:"kafi sahi book kai. mai kal se 4 page par liya.wo train me ja raha hota hai. summer train. ek ladki se milta hai.to wo use bolta hai ki mai writer hoon. aur uska 1st book kya tha....haan kuch 3 mistakes.....wo bolta hai uske bare me"

Guy2: "sahi be....ladki kaisi thi!!"

Guy3:"arre uska kuch movie bhi aa raha hai...'hello' naam hai shayad."

Guy2:"bhag...wo to kabka release ho gaya...kuch aur hai....mai to kal hi bookstore jake uske charo book order de diya....mere full collection ban jayega"
*****************


Location: Cigarette Shop (By some eerie coincidence all of india's cigarette-pan wala hav a best friend who is inevitably chai-wala!!! And dey talk abt evrything frm politics to poultry!!)

Characters:Cigarette wala (A) and Pan wala(B)

The conversation was in Hindi and Oriya mix....I translated Oriya to Hindi!!
B: "arre ek naya oriya filam lagi hai... 2012...kal dekh aaya"

A:"wo angrezi filam hai.....oriya nahi....dubbin ki hai"


B:"ooo...par sahi movie hai....dikhata hai duniya 2012 me khatam ho jayega"


A:"ye sab jhut dikhate hai"


B:"nahi...sahi me!! wo ek movie thi na...titanic...uski tarah duniya kahatam ho jayega....mai to pura dar gaya"


A nd B both hurriedly lighting cigarette


A:"isse aacha to hai cigarette pee ke hi mar jaye"

******************

Location: Train to Kolkata...meant to be reserved....more crowded than general!!

Characters: Two guys stayin in some hostel


Guy1: "Arre aaj mess me mai aur prakash gaye the....wahan abhi paisa dene par ek coupon dete hai meal ka"

Guy 2: "accha"

Guy1:"mere coupon me 'M' likha tha....par prakash aake bola...abe yaar tere me M likha hai par mere me 'W' kyun likha hai!!"

Guy1:" main coupon dekha fir bola....abe gadhe tere me bhi M likha hai....tune coupon ulta pakra tha"
*********************

Location: Same train as above.....now more crowded...and a guy fallin over me....me disgusted

Characters: Uncle and Cousin

Uncle: "Tune seat kaise chod diya....??"


Cousin:" Arre mujhe toilet jana tha...aake dekha seat le liya"


Uncle:" Arre gadhe aise koi toilet jata hai....itni lagi thi to yahan newspaper bichake karna tha na!!"

Me(Almost loud): "Wat the fuck!!!"



------------------------


Guess wat!!!! I got my 1st award....yay!!!!



Thanks Chandni for considering me :D


Now as per rules....7 things dat no one knows abt me!!!
1> Most of da mornings I wake up wid a hard on and lose 5 mins convincing myself dat its only mornin...no need to get excited (**cummon no disgusted luks...u ppl wanted to kno!!)

2>I stole a 20 bucks wala cold drinks bottle frm our college canteen....(ohh cummon...he overcharges!!! and if ur da canteen wala, I am just boasting...how cn u even imagine i wud steal frm u)

3>Dere was a language skill class in college long time bak...we were supposed to giv speech on our idol.....I choose "Himesh Reshmmiya" (I still remember da face of da teacher and whole class fr dose 5 mins...horrified to core.....dunt worry Himesh is not my idol....maybe Anu Malik is!!)

4>Till class 7th or 8th I thot engineers are ppl who drove rail engines...and cudnt figure out why it was so coveted....its just lame ass drivin!!!...(
hah!!! now i am studying engineering)

5>The farewell gift I gave to my class teacher after 10th... was actually bought by a frnd of mine to propose to his crush....sad fr him he got rejected.. :D (
cummon...nyways he ws gonna throw dat away!)

6>I actually went to see RGV ki Aag....and sat thru the whole movie....(
I cudnt speak dat whole evenin)

7>I can fly....(wats dat look...see now u dont trust me...u trusted me fr all of da above...nd not fr dis...how mean)



Now as per rules I pass on this award to those few who truly write frm heart...in tru spirit of bloggin...

1>Shreya: Creativ maximus....she has her way wid words...and she writes her heart out!!!

2>Orange: i adore her wen she ponders...coz she ends up askin such questions dat we all fail to answer.....she dares to ask!!!

3>Bliss: I wait fr her comments..coz apart frm me rarely nyone reads my post wid so much sensitivity....she writes less...but writes wat she feels...unadulterated


4>Raghav: He black paints darkness....switch off da lights...and read some of his scribblings...darkness will engulf u!!!


5>Annie:coz she is da magical maiden...coz wen i see ny new post frm her....i keep it to read at da end of da day...coz i am sure...she will always make me smile at da end!!


6>All my oder new blog frnds and very old blog frnds who knos how much i love dem....u know how precious u ppl are....and ur comments are!!!...cheers!!!


And finally, the rules for you guys out there:
1) List 7 things about yourself that nobody know.
2) Pass on this award to 7 other people.
3) Comment on their blog and let them know that they are tagged.

Yea....I boast!!!::

"BF : There is a very peculiar character in his writing. He says more than what he 'needs' to say. I wouldn't. But he does."

-Chandni


Thursday, October 29, 2009

Seat belt


He dint knew the name of the road, neither did he cared. Slowly he walked. Staring at his shadow slowly circling around him, as he passed under the array of street lights. His dark alter-ego dwarfing and elongating, as if replaying his life.

In never really cold in Calcutta, but the fog was dense. Moon looked hazy, but beautiful.

A drop of blood trickled down from his forehead and got stuck in his eyebrow.

------------

'We should have started early'

'I know, and it’s the 10th time you are saying this'

'Huh, but what’s the use, Arijit. You had to see sunset at the beach. So did your sun do a little tap dance before it set’, Neera replied.

'Come on it was beautiful, the changing colours of the sky. In Calcutta sky is always dull grey, don’t you get bored of it'

'No, I have better things to get bored of'

------------

The pain was setting in. But he refused to acknowledge it. Slowly he limped forward.

Occasional cars zoomed past him. He wished they switch off their headlights. The glare irritated him.

Arijit searched his pockets. The cigarette packet was still there, but crumpled.

He took a broken cigarette and lighted it.

------------

Arijit's dwarfed Maruti desperately tried to keep pace with the mammoth Lorries overtaking him.

The loneliness of highway was luring him with its overflowing breeze.

Neera looked visibly bored.

'Why don’t you put the seat belt?'Neera asked

'Is there any check post out here?'

'No, but seat belts are not meant for check post, it’s more about something called safety'

'Yea right, as if they don’t tie me enough on Calcutta roads. Let me be free here at least'

'Whatever' She replied, tightening her seat belt a bit.

------------

Few urchins huddled near the burning garbage. The raw smell of burning plastic nauseated him a bit.

But he hobbled towards the fire for the welcome heat.

With his dusty torn clothes, he dint attracted much attention.

------------

'Call Montu da and order sum dinner. I think there is nothing left in fridge' she said

'No network dear. Don’t worry we will parcel something on the way'

'Uff, I don’t wanna have outside food again. Let’s go home we will manage something.'

The fog was turning dense. The sharp glare of passing Lorries turned into distant aura of light.

Mist seeping in through the windows filled him with a musky smell earth.

------------

His head was slowly clearing up. Thoughts and pain rushed to fill the emptiness inside him.

He resisted. He wanted to be void.

He looked at his watch. A shard of glass was stuck between the hands of time. A desperate attempt to stop time.

9:12 it read.

-------------

'What is the time?'

'God, look in your own wrist watch would you' he replied

'Cummon I like when you tell me the time!!’ she smiled

'OK weirdo!! Its 9:10 or something' he tried to read the time.

The light of an approaching lorry suddenly engulfed him. Night turned into day it seemed.

He pushed the brake hard, bit too hard.

A snap.

The car got mind of its own.

The lorry sped away. It was darkness all over again.

The screech of the burning tyre broke the silence.

'Jump out of the car' he screamed to her.

He jumped out of the door and glanced back.

She was struggling to open her seat belt.

Death smiled. Life apologised.

The crunch of the breaking window panes.

The car turned once. Then twice.

The hungry flames lighted the vast fields of harvested wheat.

Smell of burning flesh confirmed.

-------------

He stared at the dying flame of the fire. He sat alone.

The urchins and the mongrels huddled around another garbage bin on fire.

It was going to be a long cold night.

Tomorrow he will cry.
Tomorrow he will burn in guilt for rest of his life.
Tomorrow he will accept pity and listen to those sugar-coated lies.
But tonight he will live for one last time.

Tonight he was allowed to shed just

One Drop of Tear!!

P.S: Tried to keep it short dis time....hope it not too cramped :)

Sunday, October 11, 2009

...And then Love!!



The crispness of panjabi kurta was long lost. Sweat is an uninvited friend in this perennial humidity of Calcutta. The chaos was getting on his nerves. Still he managed a bleak smile to those unknown guests lost on their way to the Buffet room.

Standing at his own wedding Sudeep felt as a total stranger. Everything happened so fast. His travel consultancy business was just holding grip when the news of his mother's throat cancer shook him.

He couldn't muster courage to confront her when his mother asked him to marry her best friend's daughter.

He always believed there will be plenty of time to fall in love after he made something out of himself. Love cheated him.

He lighted a cigarette standing on the balcony.

------------

Someone was kind enough to turn the table fan towards her.

Sitting at centre of the hall under the critical eyes of hundreds she silently cursed every drop of sweat that made her twitch.

She never thought that the day she dreamt about all these years will turn out to be such a nightmare. She longed to get out of this heavy Benarasi sari.

As other upper middle class daughters Anindita was convent educated. But still in her family, politics and freedom was something women were never trusted with.

She never dreamt of falling in love. It was all very filmy. All she wanted was to get out of that monotonous past of hers to a liberal present.


She never really had any conversations with Sudeep but he seemed decent. But how could she really know? She trusted her parents. But he is a complete stranger.

She looked around. Where is he?

----------

'So, are u comfortable here?' Sudeep asked, unsure if he should open his kurta in presence of a woman or not.

'Yes' Anindita replied trying to keep the fear hidden in her voice.

How she wished she got a bigger suitcase from home to hide herself inside it.

'So how was your dinner?'

'Nice....and yours?' she asked

'Yes, nice too...I mean good'

'I will be leaving for Delhi tomorrow evening...just for 2 days....work....will u be fine?'

In midst of this chaos, this office tour came as a welcome relief to him. He so desperately wanted to get away and rethink this whole situation.

She nodded. She was not really sure what was she supposed to do. She recalled how her mother packed her father's luggage before every such trip.

Maybe she could go to her home for 2 days. She felt a bit relieved.

Suddenly the double bed felt so cramped. They tried to stick to the edge of the bed making sure not to touch each other. The silence was broken by the whining of the ceiling fan and the soft rustle of her sari.

'So are u comfortable here?' he asked.

------------
He looked so innocent when he is asleep, she thought.

She sat silently and watched a thin smile play on his lips along the rhyme of his dreams.

He was curled up in the corner of his bed as if guarding his secrets of the night from the cruel sunlight.


He felt a soft nudge on his shoulder. But somehow it seemed to go along with his dream.

Then he heard his name but the voice was different.

'Its 9 already, your mother asked me to wake u up’, she said.

'Oh...yes...soorry...hmm...hi...I mean good morning'

She smiled.

She was combing her wet hair and he realised he never really looked at her till now.

The tiny little drops of water shaken out of hair by the brutal pull of her comb formed a glittering aura around her shining in sunlight.

The pain in her face when a knotted hair got pulled and her struggle to hide it.

The soft fresh smell of turmeric from yesterday was still there and she justified it.

She is beautiful.

-------------

Sealdah Railway Station has been an epitome of confusion for every Calcuttan. Nobody gets there direction right for the first time.

In midst of the flowing crowd of Office returning people it was hard to find the platform for Rajdhani.

Anindita secretly regretted her decision to come to the station to drop Sudeep. But she was getting tired of the constant pampering she had to deal with morning onwards at that house.

Sudeep's cousin was too busy figuring out the coach number. Sudeep slowed down to catch up with her.

He saw the horror in her eyes and smiled.

Sudeep held her hand. But as soon as he did, he regretted not asking her permission.

Then he slowly felt the grip of her fingers around her palm. He could feel the flow of her blood. He could feel the throb of her heartbeat.

They walked towards the train. The crowd has slowly thinned. But he forgot to lose his grip.

The train was about to leave. He suddenly regretted all the hassle for the trip. 2 days felt years. And he had so many new feelings to be felt.

The signal turned green. He loosened his grip, but her fingers kept holding his hand for a moment too long. A hesitation.

Her engagement ring left an impression on his palm. He wished it stayed for 2 more days.

He walked, and then ran. But climbed on the pedestal when he could not keep up with the speed of the train.

A last look into her eyes. She had so much to say, he wanted to listen, he promised to listen. But all her eyes could say was,

A drop of tear!


"Train roll on, on down the line
Won't you please take me far away
Now, I feel the wind blow outside my door
I leave my woman at home

Tuesday's gone with the wind
My baby's gone with the wind"

-Tuesday's Gone,Lynyrd Skynyrd




P.S: Wanted it to be shorter....but couldnt make it ny more short....hope its readable!!!

Thursday, September 24, 2009

Howrah Bridge - 55 Fiction

"My exams are going on...and i am thoroughly frustrated.So due to lack of time, decided to write my first 55 Fiction(itz a form of micro fiction to be limited under 55 words)....bear wid me "



Sweaty feet made railing sloppy.I looked back to life, saw traffic jam.

I jumped.

The blades of wind ripped my skin.My flesh bare.


Death promised more than life.

Suddenly ropes of life tightened over my chest.


A jerk!!

I was flying back to life.Death disappointed.


My first Bungee Jump from Howrah Bridge.

Wednesday, September 9, 2009

Monologue of a dying Cigarette


A kiss of your lips,
a guilty look in your eyes.
Your tight gripping fingers,
lost hopes realised.

Sudden stroke of your thumb
and ashes of sorrow falls by.
The light headed look,
now you are floating in the sky.

Let me be your failures.
Let me be those lies.
Let me be the key,
to your lost paradise.

The fire in my heart,
is burning your pain.
Let me be your last,
promise me never again.

Am I death?
as the wise men say.
Or just a nail,
in the coffin of pain u lay.

Lying on the roadside,
crushed and bruised.
I am dying your death,
as u and another me walks away.



-Me or my cigarette


P.S: I personally found it too rhyming for my comfort....lemme kno ur views :)

Friday, August 28, 2009

Funny thing called Love


It was the last cigarette of the packet. It’s funny how the last cigarette suddenly feels so costly as if compensating for the rest 9 of the burned ashes, he thought. His fingers now had a distinct smell of nicotine and sweat accumulated over the years.

For Animesh the lanes of Esplanade was a respite, the crowd seems to live his lost happiness on his behalf. The relentless clatter kept his mind calm, it was his own thoughts he feared the most.

He edged towards thirty but looked a lot older. Pollution he blamed. But somewhere down the rat race it was life that cheated him. Dreams were traded for reality. Promises he made to himself were long broken. A low paying job that took care of his addiction was enough for him. His eyes had the darkness of a dying person reminiscing.

His most evenings were spent in those dingy old bookstores in the back lanes surfing through sleazy crime novels. He hoped he may someday find his own story printed somewhere there. But it was too dark in there for him to find.

He walked slowly trying to make circles of smoke with his mouth. Then suddenly, a glimpse. He stopped and scanned the crowd again. Maybe he was imagining things.

Then she saw her, on New Market junction. She was still the same; bruises of life seemed to have escaped her. He was about to call her but his voice failed. The past came rushing to fill the vacuum

----------

Sitting in some un-named park in central Calcutta.

'Promise me we will always stay together’, Trina said.

'We will' It was her innocent rhetorical questions that still amused him 3 years after he met her.

He could see his future. He believed in himself.

By thirty a nice apartment in South Calcutta, those which have a park for kids to play. A happy job in one of those promising high rises coming up in his city.

After all he is an engineer, who could resist him.

And then there was Trina. All he could ever want. She always looks so pretty in blue and she knew that too.

Love is the warmth of her cheek on his shoulder. Love is her long soft fingers that so tightly gripped his hand, that sometime hurts but he wouldn’t admit. Love is that unknown perfume that she never disclosed she used. She is love.

-----------

'Do you love me?' she asked

'Yaaa' he said slightly irritated, those useless questions of her bothered him. It was 4 years of their relationship.

This was a great opportunity for him. Working at the head office in Mumbai. After all that’s where he could make all contacts that can accelerate his promotion.

'In India opportunities means compromise' his father used to say.

And he wasn’t leaving for good. Within 2 years he will be back with her and with a better life. Why can’t she understand?

----------

'Maybe we should break-up' Trina said on phone

'Maybe we should' he replied.

They haven’t met for over a year. Sometimes it was hard to recall her face. Shopper’s Stop dint kept her perfume.

He couldn't believe that she can leave him. His ego was hurt. He knew he could stop her from abandoning him, but why should he?

It wasn’t his fault; all he wanted is his career to shine enough to light both of their lives. Is that a crime?

----------

Trina stopped calling long ago. But she took something from him. He still could not figure out what. But it hurts.

Mumbai is so lonely. Every Sunday lots of family comes to crowded Juhu Beach to make sand castles. There happiness mocked him now.

She is also sad, he tries to reason himself. Hah!! Whom am I kidding?

------------

They said he had lost the edge; they have to let him go. He smirked.

He had nothing to pack. Mumbai was never his home. It was just a stop-over.

All he was worried about how he is going to spend 30 hours in train without smoking. Smoking Kills!!!

-------------

He followed her through the crowd of Esplanade. She looks happy he thought satisfyingly. Maybe she is happily married now.

A pang of jealousy shot thorough him quickly subsided by a feeling of fulfilment. He loved her so much he realised.

He thought if he should call her name, but den he saw the cigarette butt in his fingers. He had changed a lot, for worse.

He would just get her sympathy now, he didn’t deserved love anymore.

Love is her unmanaged hair through which she runs her fingers.

-------------

She was suddenly lost in crowd. But this time he did not tried to find her. He quietly turned towards the approaching tram. Its slow pace was something he could relate to.

-------------

Trina suddenly stopped in front of that dimly lit store. A blue salwar kameej displayed caught her attention. She remembered the sparkle in eyes of Animesh whenever she wore blue.

Love was in his arms that once held her tight. Love was his eyes that used to stare her for hours. Love was his voice that filled her heart. He was love.

A Drop of Tear!!

Saturday, August 8, 2009

The Day Earth Moved To and Fro!!


Firstly.....

DRINKING IS INJURIOUS TO HEALTH!!!!!

SMOKING KILLS!!!


SNIFFING UNKNOWN CHEMICALS FROM MYRIAD SOURCES MAKES U RETARD!!!!


AND DOIN ALL THREE SIMULTANEOUSLY....WELL TAKE A GUESS!!!


ok ok!!! now forget all dese....coz dat night i dint remember dis too....


8.30 pm:

world is still a happy place....ppl sings....enjoys...and i can still figure out my left hand from right!!!

da auto arrives....dunt give me cheapo luks...its rourkela!!

9.30 pm:
well by sheer luck we can manage sum space at da lounge...our very own booth....well yea it was lill cramped...but adjust yaaar!!!


10.00pm
:

my sore throat lost da battle against da chilled beer....and slowly gave in....no more fits of cough...

and a cheered beer bottoms-up round (**performed under controlled environment...dunt try at home...visit ur nearest bar!!!)

world slowly turned into a lill to bright....but still happier place....ppl smokes more dan sings....

10.15 pm:

apparently we were supposed to stop now!!....well if we had...den we wud hav had a nice dinner..and came bak and slept....but we dint....u see!!!

10.30 pm:

do u kno a funny thing abt whisky.....never hav it raw...on da rocks...and especially after havin beer....

wolrd is a bullry palce....ppl dirnks oops...sings...and movsss sloooolllyyy

10.45pm:

devil may care!!! may not....but devil shots does.....

never have booze shots in a silent dinner party!!!...well it remains not so silent....

woldr ishh a sahdy place....ppl skoms nd sniffs!!!!

(***rest of da following events r recollection of my flashes of memory and other sources***)

11:00pm:

we are apparently out of lounge in our table...foods are apparently served!!! and believe it or not...we maybe ate it...well nice dinner huh!!!

11.20pm:

we were supposed to stop drinkin isnt it!!!...well guess wat....we dint!!!

man!!! alcohol tastes sweet!!!or does it!!

11.30pm:

i actually attempted to match our enormous bill...to things we had...well i faild to remember...dunno why....

man!!! y cant i walk straight!!!

btw remember....wash basin is fr washin hands....toilet is fr peein....now i am not suggestin nythin thou!!!

12.00 am:
we successfully landed at our destination.....hugged our nightgaurds....and totally managed to exchanged a fag for a biri...trust me on dis

01.00 am:

Q: why did a guy named Pawan K. Jhonke managed to goto Pakistan widout ny restriction

A:"Panchi nadiya pawan k jhonke.....koi sarhad na inhe rooke"

well i kno u found it disgustin....but dat time we dint....we laughed on dis sittin on top of sum roof we dunt remember climbin...

02.00 am:
i was confused why my left hand is on da left side of my body and wat will happen if i had a right hand in left side of my body instead...yea...u get da picture!!!


03.00 am:


well we may not sing well!!!...but we sing loud!!! and so thou after disgusted looks by oder sane ppl in our vicinity...we sang...umm...we shouted and tried to sing.....

by now my once-upon-a-time-sore-throat....was plannin an action plan fr future!!!(wich i am facin currently)

04.00 am:
an omelette just off da oven is supposed to be hot and can burn ur fingers!!!

hah!!! its just a myth i found it just warm!! and tasty ofcourse!!!

05.00 am:

i tried to drink water....i tried to make my bed.....but my bed was swaying...i hardly managed to hold it....climb in...buckle me up...so dat i dunt fall in da vast space over wich we were flying....and i slept in midst of zoomin meteors!!!phew!!!


02:00 pm(next afternoon):
my clothes r all white by lime dust...i am half off my bed....and my head was conduction a nuclear explosion test!!!

i can hardly move my hands.....and why da fuck is my fingers tips burned!!!






Wednesday, July 1, 2009

I looked at you and....



you said 'Hold me tight'
like the sky holds quivering starlight.
like the darkness holds,
a lonely tree highway side.

you said 'Add colors to my life'
The reds of the Mediterranean,
The blues of the Niles
and bit of grey of my Calcutta sky.

you said 'Walk with me'
in the melting heat on the concrete streets.
Hand in hand so tight,
even the sweat fails to trickle by.

you said 'Be my sunshine'
Scattered in the morning mist,
a secret warmth,clandestine.

you said 'Hide me from those judgemental eyes'
we reclaimed our darkness,
in the glare of neon lights.
the mute night stands alibi.

Then you said 'goodbye'
a drop of tear from the black sky.
occasional wind fail to stir the leaves.
hush, can you listen her lost lullaby?


-Me wid a dash of romanticism

Wednesday, May 27, 2009

She-Pee-Amm


dey came...dey conquered...(well ya sometimes by riggin polls...buts dats ok!!)....dey destroyed a state....and well....now dey got whupped by Mamata di....phew!!

mom dirt and homo sapiens (well i m pretty sure dat means same as maa mati manush)....congo....u won....how?? well i dunt hav a clue!!

"Is Jyoti Basu a man or a woman???....it is a woman's name!!!"

dat was my 1st proper question to my dad about Bengal Politics or CPM...or Bengal politics...well was it ny different???!!

well i must admit i always hav soft corner fr communist.....

cmmon....'comrades' is way too cool.....and also da fact dat if all two faced hypocrite bongs hated dem....how cud dey always win???

equations did changed now...."Tata" communists...catch ya later....

so as our leftists(man...i hope dey use dere right hand while eatin!!) make stage fr a quick disappearance....i go down to investigate....hows thing gonna change fr us...

1> mastermoshai: "potka...y ish eur homewuark not complete...??" potka: "yeshterday bangla bondh sir"

well potka....get a new xcuse....bangla is no more gettin closed....

2> mom to son(in recent future) : "soja mere munna....nahin to mamata di will scream....!!"

well guys...more scream therapy fr next 5 yrs....

government sucked....she screamed.....people died....she screamed....Tata took lands....well!! she screamed......elections began...she screamed....she won.....ahhh!! she had a bad throat!!!

3> Hungry Kya!!

till 3 yrs ago...for Bengalis....McDonald was a dumb American...and Kentucky was Wild West....

wake up babey!!....no more egg rolls from Montu da's Fast Food......wid no more RED on da horizon....its sholoanna burgeriana....!!

4>Its a frog....Its a Tasmanian devil....its "Nano".....

well nano-giri..is da new gandhi-giri....get one of those soon...

5> Hands of gods....

well ....da news is....da communists r feelin dat star quotient is absent frm dere election campaign...

come nxt elections.....maradona will be our very next potential MLA....he is langotia yaar of subhas-da...


dunno my fellow bongs wat future holds fr us....but surely da present sucks!!!

"She-Pee-Amm will be back....yeu know....communishm ish in awar bilaad...."

-overheard an old man in metro rail


Wednesday, May 6, 2009

too much...too soon


I am confused...
or maybe realised too much too soon.

a line of thought too fast to read,
or even understand.
a flickering image of something so known,
yet so vaguely dormant.


I have lost the scale of happiness,
not that I am sad.

but could I even realise that.
After all sorrows and ecstasies are same play
just different acts.


I cant remember her smell

hard I try more I fail.

all I recall is her fleeting glance
trust i lost formalities sans.


I
from my morning blues,
through late afternoon and evenings too.

parting my hair is my mother's nail

a touch I know will leave someday.



I am loosing the fear of pain.

the trust in god,

also comfort of blame.

an erratic mind to comfort.

an ailing body to sustain.

-me or a looser who desperately tries to be me

Friday, April 10, 2009

Shut up and dance!!




Dancing like mad in a group dance : !!check!!

yea cummon....i m sure u also have a list of things u want to do before u die....those freaky things abt which u had silent fantasies in night ...those emotional vows that u gave urself every time u fell and thought that this is the moment u will change urself....those angry revenges u planned so vivaciously for da guy who ran away wid ur date.....!!!

well atleast fr me 1 got checked off da list!!! yipeee!!

so da occasion was our hall day...wid overrated food and high bass music system....

and da best thing oder dan dancing madly is watchin ppl dancing madly....u can see a person whole emotion coming out....unrestricted....pure....and sometimes...ahem...ugly!!!

but i noticed u can group dem into few categories...and it do tell lots abt dere character:

1>Party Starter: dey r da self-presumed-cool-dudes of da group.....and dey always need to keep one step ahead as a measure of dere coolness...so as soon as da drumroll beings...dey r on da floor...thou dey dunt do much of dancing....dere main objective is pulling dere not so interested partners on da floor and get lost in crowd!!!


2>Touch-me-nots:dey r da ppl who r found on da periphery of da dance floor....all dey can manage is lill hip groove and claps....loads of claps....as soon as u invite dem to dance...dey will blush away...but nevertheless dey will stay at dat periphery awaitin more invitation to reject!!


3>1-man-band: dey r mostly in da centre stage....closed eyes...and drenched in own or oders sweat!!....dey r totally frustrated wid life....and want to dance as vigorously as dey shag off!!....behind dere closed eyes dey r wid aishwarya in da valleys of Ooty...dey mostly end up wid asthma attacks!!


4>toy-train-runners: yes....u have dem evrywhere....dey dunt kno a dime abt dancing....dey dunt have faintest idea dat dey suck in dancing....all dey can do is make annoyin human trains wid dere fellow train-runners and stamp through ppls feet over da dance floor....ouch!!! mine feet hurts even now!!! assholes!!


5>body-vibrators: dey r da friendly guys on da floor....all dey do is vibrate dere odd body parts occasionally and keep welcomin newcomers to da floor and bid goodbye to those leavin....dey stay till da end...wen da DJ requests dem to get da fuck off da floor...nd keeps wonderin...why??



6>territorial groups: dey r da late joiners....dey always find dere own territory on da floor and shows all dere monkey dance on dat labelled region....rest of da floor is alien to dem...and incase some one wanders off ...he can be found in a state of shock at da end of da party....totally lost!!!



7>hippie dancers: dey r probably da best dancers of da floor...and dey feel sorry for we lesser mortals....so all dey do is go to person to person...shows dem some steps to keep dem engaged for rest of da evenin....nd carries on!!....long live hippies!!!



8>worthless commenters: dey r da useless of all...dey sit in a far corner away from da dance floor...and all dey do is comment on oder ppls dancin style....but silently covets abt burnin da dance floor....hey wait a sec!!!...dat sounds like me!! ohh hell wid me!!!



so as i was outwardly laughin and inwardly coveting abt da whole situation....my fellow frnd commenter Anubhav( anubhavrath.blogspot.com ) said those golden words.....

"I always wanted to dance madly in situation like dis....but i guess i am too shy"

and dats all i needed....wat followed is a fierce realisation of our dreams....on non-understandable vulgar Oriya tracks....and rest was sweaty!!!! really sweaty!!!


"We're fools whether we dance or not, so we might as well dance."

-Japanese Proverb

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

So Dark The Con of Man



have u ever embraced darkness??

yea i kno sounds funny...but if ur a person like me, who loves da darkness of darkness....u kno xactly wat i mean....

we both share a black heart...and r selfish enuf to love our self in da blanket of dark....

few days ago the hostel authorities gt bored nd decided to play wid us wid a long midnite power cut....xcept for da fact it was all hot nd sweaty nd i dint had much battery backup in my lappy :(

i went out to explore....

da first thing abt darkness is u realise importance of ur eyes....and in its absence how ur all oder senses get alerted....

every sound is magnified nd sppoky.....da tossing of my roommate in bed, da frequent beep in nearby rooms in a attempt to keep dere mobile screen glowin...

walking through the corridors...u can hear snippets of conversation in da passin rooms which u always so conveniently ignored earlier....

have u seen da nite sky in those hours of darkness...i can bet dere is nothin more beautiful in dis world dan dat....xcept Anne Hathaway of course....

how da black sky turns grey in a split of a second da darkness befalls.....nd all everythin turns into a mere black outline in da canvas....big trees....imposing building...walking men....all turns into a mere black shadow...

its da way da dark disguises u....turns ur face into a sheath of black veil....and u always keep guessin da expression

nyways tired i cam bak to bed to my singin mosquitoes.....dey love to entertain me.....nd kept openin nd closin my eyelid tryin to figure da difference in da degree of darkness...

yea...i m wierd....gudnite!!!

"Darkness is to space what silence is to sound, i.e., the interval." -Marshall McLuhan

Thursday, March 12, 2009

Anatomy of Failure


wat is it wid human nd failure....da way we hate it...despise it....run away frm it....

i dunno who was dat gr8 guru who justified dat winnin is good nd loosing is bad....but if u happen to find him...pls slap him on behaf of me....he just made all our life miserable.....

I am a big failure in my life.....but look, I am as proud as dat nude slum kid shittin in side of da road nd staring at u wid da confident mind-ur-own-business look....

ya ya...now u will say its his blog nd all so he is jst showing off.....

1stly....it is my blog dear...so i can show off...

nd 2ndly... I am not showing off....its just happens to be da fact..

I particularly dunt feel suicidal as my fellow classmates wen dey score "0" in class test....

I dunt get embarrassed nd all wen a gal givs me...who-gav-him-da-right-to-be-so-ugly look....

nd I m pretty proud of my fat reserves...makes me feel comfortable abt ny future famine....

but i dunt understand why dis simple things freaks out most of da ppl....cmmon....if a person makes fun of me....it can have only 2 reasons...either he is insecure of me....or he is trying to show himself off....he doesn't have ny particular grudges against me....

nd if it helps him...its fine wid me....

actually accrdin to me....humans r better off as failures....its our ultimate goal.....we r da catalysts of destruction.....always runnin around to increase da entropy nd all.....yeaa!!! i discussed some science shit....cummon roll ur eyes!!!

nd more da failure ur...more fun is ur life.....nd ur better off

1> Bill Gates: Windows sucks!!!...he is richest!!

2>Ambani bros: Reliance connection sucks....again rich!!

3>Himesh Reshmiyya: Well!!!!

4>Deve Gowda: slept thru his PM term.....no controversy PM

5>Danny Boyle:Slumdog......8 oscars :P

6>NIT Rourkela Electrical faculty: no comments!!!

so cant we just be proud nd happy abt our failures....accepting it as da way dey r.....like our ex-Indian cricket team....(ya i acknowledge the current one isnt dat bad!!)

thou i promise u doin all dis wont make u successful or nything....u will continue to be a failure...but at least a happy one!!! :-)

so make it ur motto to congratulate urself nxt time u fail....coz i m always dere wid u.....

nd thou i kno u will forget all dis nd continue to be miserable in ur life....i just wrote it coz it will make my blog luk gud.... ;)


'Have you ever seen a one-legged dog making its way down the street?
If you've ever seen a one-legged dog then you've seen me

Then you've seen me, I come and stand at every door
Then you've seen me, I always leave with less than I had before
Then you've seen me, bet I can make you smile when the blood, it hits the floor
Tell me, friend, can you ask for anything more?'

-The Wrestler,Bruce Springsteen

Monday, February 16, 2009

maTure matter



"As we maTure our relationship maTures with us"

-Marshall, How I Met Your Mother

me as a child always wanted me to be da matured man....ideally dad-like....always givin assurances and buying the tickets...and i am sure its been da case with mostly all of us...

all of us at sometimes of dere childhood had brushed dad's razor over our cheeks and wishin beard pops overnite.....nd tried to taste tiny sip of drink frm his glass..wen he isnt looking and kept a straight face wen our mouth was burning....in short...each one of us has tried to grow up...

but did we really grew up anytime??? did any mornin we were short for our pants....

never happnd 2 me at least....days passed and we stopped wanting to grow up so desperately...we secretly started to like da laid back attitude of our childhood...

den BAM!! somebody tells u dat yes...u r mature and its about time u start to act like one....dress like one and be a eloquent two faced bastard like one...

so wat is exactly being mature!!! how can u distinguish dat person in a crowd..

Ahh well!! few tests r dere:

1>He/She never uses the words like 'yes' or 'no'...its always 'maybe', 'i will try my level best' or 'i hope not'......we r bunch of no-risk-takers who always plays safe keepin all option open

2>He/She is always jealous of u...nd believe me most of da time da kicks u get frm dem in ur ass are of frustration....but will always keep dat sweet-poison smile and give u a "hearty" congratulation for ur success....

3>He/She is still loves to have dat candy-bar frm dat they-make-ice-cream-frm-drain-water ice cream wala....but will roll their eyes nd make fun abt how people even dare to think abt havin dem

4>He/She still loves da window seat at the bus...nd wen dey graciously ask u to go and have da seat...dey r literally stabbing you in our thoughts...scary huh!!

5>And lastly wen u grab out dat extra candy from their pocket thinkin its ur birth-right...well hello!!

actually wen a guy says he has grown mature all he means is dat he has started to have underarm hair.....rest all is an illusion

a frnd of mine always keeps me asking, "Why I am not as mature as rest??"

All I can say is 'coz u have guts to face da world and dunt need to pretend like rest of us'.

just under our fake skin we r all dat selfish fat-ass bully who used to steal ur tiffin in primary school.

And it is us u trust with ur every thing....ur freedom...ur tax money....and ur patriotism....

God Bless u!!


"They got caught up in your talent show,
With you persnickety little bastards in your fancy dress,
Who just judge each other and try to impress"


-Wise men, James blunt

Saturday, February 7, 2009

Salli Khushi!!


Ahem!! Check 1 2 3....

yea...my hibernating season is over...so am bak....

and if ur concerned y was I ' long time no see!', dere r loads of factor leadin to it....namely

1>In da last one month i was drunk most evenins....so lukin thru my perspective i m not gone
     fr long...

2>I was concerned why our director is such a pain in arse.....nowadays he is only givin lectures to Osama, LeT nd Raj Thackrey on new methods of torture....

3>I again tried to analyse wat worthful things i did wid my life....all i cud figure was payin 20 bucks to Helpage India during skool

4>I spent a considerable chunk of time gettin lost in IIT Kgp campus....man it was scary!!!:P

5>and yes....obviously as my new year resolution was to learn to wear boxer underpants instead of briefs...hence i spent lots of time adjusting my assets to da new surroundings...

But gettin to da point...as we r all gettin adjusted and acquainted wid da new year....things r turnin out differently for me and Ramalinga Raju....

we both r facin da much awaited wrath of fate.....

be it da already availed grade bak in dis semester for my bunkotsav to da not so successful :P venture to IIT frm summer internship....things r goin 2 drain fr me....

luks like its gonna be a helluva year fr me...

summer uselessness and severe grade recession is soon to follow.....

but yes...i hav my laptop and bed to fall back on at da end of da day....literally...so who cares!!


"Dararein dararein Maathe pe maula
Maramat mukkadar ki kar do maula"

-Arziyan,Delhi 6

Thursday, January 1, 2009

Jingle Balls,Jingle Balls, Jingle in da pants!!



Happy New Year!!!

Ahhh....anoder year passed..and i hav to practice writin '09' instead of '08'....

So after a pretty decent party wid family....I am now alone in my room speculatin wat dis year holds for me....

it feels funny how dis year came to all of us.....for me on a footpath wid my ipod blaring nonsense in my ears.....for few of my frnds cursing ourselves fr not gettin drunk...for my galfrnd being too drunk to speak nonsense....

so all i do is to luk bak at dis now-past-year...and decide wat it impression it left on mine and our mind for our future

GOOD IMPRESSIONS:

1>Exactly a year ago...i was travellin to hostel missin my home...2day i am sittin at home missin my frnds.....2008 taught me to live alone happily....hmmm  ...very happily

2>Meeting da woman of my life....ya...finally i met her...and 2008 taught me to be in love...wich is much better dan falling in it

3>Discovering the flavour of my life....omlette...cummon dunt giv me dat look.....its da only thing our mess-wallahs can cook well.....2008 taught me to value eggs...more dan hens..nd even cocks

4>Being comfortably numb.....yea...i was introduced to da dizziness of alcohol.....that was as decently i can put da phrase 'being drunk'....2008 taught me to booze...

5>Buddys for life.....dis year i met my best buddy.....my laptop.....he is my best hangout....and we also have some e-books stored to fool ourselves dat we can study if we like.......we hope to remain together forever....or till a better laptop model is out...2008 taught me how to waste time

BAD IMPRESSIONS:

1>Himesh Reshmiyya released his 2nd film.....yea i kno its sad

2>Sharmili became our permanent teacher.....things cudnt get any worse....2008 taught me dat for every bunch of hopeful engineers...dere is a hopeless sharmili

3>Our director's rumour abt retiring was turned out to be untrue....our only streak of hope abt happy college life was shattered

4>I got few very gud frnds....my best frnds....and why da hell is it a bad impression...coz wid da end of 2008 i will have only 2.5 years more to spend wid dem....2008 taught me gud things dunt last forever....bad things do

5>I lost very precious things this year....and wid those precious things i lost my blindfold from the pain of life and death...i realised...life is the hard way out....



So wid all dese impressions I step forward to 2009....maybe the last year when i can afford to be careless...

maybe da last year i can dream before beginin to work for it.....

maybe da last year to make a mistake and afford to forget it......

"Aankhon Mein Jis Ke Koi To Khwaaab Hai
Khush Tha Wahin Jo Thoda Betaaab Hai
Zindagi Mein Koi Arzooo Kijiye
Phir Dekhiye ……"
-Phir Dekhiye,Rock On!!
once again.....a VERRY HAPPY NEW YEAR!!